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You Do Have Gifts to Give

Richard Grehalva — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 12:00:00 GMT

I was asked in as few words as possible why I speak and teach. Here is my answer "my father Greywolf as well as other Native Americans believe "the gifts we have been given are not ours to keep and we must give them away."

When I work with people over 50 years old...one area I teach them is “give their gifts away” But, here is the biggest obstacle...they do not believe they have any gifts to give.

Do you sometimes feel as though you’re caught in life’s quicksand?...you are not alone.

We work, we struggle, we try to do everything we possibly can to move on to a higher level of well-being but it seems like the harder we work, the more stuck we get. If you’re approaching a Category 5 frustration level, you might give this a try

Switch your focus from that really nice but frustrated person in the mirror to one or more of the other folks who inhabit this good earth.

I realize that it ís important to watch out for number one...ourselves. We need to set goals, lay out plans and then do those things we need to do so that we can at least make some progress toward our goals.

What frequently happens is that we easily become so over-focused on ourselves and our own personal well-being that we wind up building huge walls. We lose the ability or even desire to see the bigger picture and the possibilities that life presents to us.

We become so focused on me that we sometimes begin scrutinizing even the most insignificant events to determine their potential impact on our personal lives.

We become victims to ourselves. And to be real honest about it, we sometimes just become so busy being busy that we lose track of where we thought we wanted our lives to wind up in the first place.

One possible solution as I mentioned earlier is to change our focus from me to others.

From being the receiver to being the giver. And no, I’m not even implying that this requires any major change in the things we do every day. It may eventually lead to that but it ís not a critical part of the initial process.

Here ís what I mean. No matter what you do to earn a living or keep the household moving in a logical direction, somewhere down the line a real person will probably benefit from what you do.

Think about it.

The work we do is not just to stuff computer systems full of information or help machines work better.

It ís not just to take people’s money so we’ll have a paycheck at the end of the week.

It ís not just filling out forms, nailing pieces of boards together, assembling electronic devices, hauling packages, going to meetings, cutting down trees, repairing cars, painting houses or stocking shelves.

Somewhere, sometime (and maybe immediately) another human being will likely be positively affected by what you do.

And yes, if you’re paying attention, you’ve noticed that I’ve used a couple of cop-out words in the preceding paragraph likely and probably. I had to do that because in the real world there are some individuals whose money-making efforts are focused mainly on non-beneficial activities. That ís just the way the world is.

For the rest of us however, our activities and work generally reflect a more positive endeavor. That leads us back to the original suggestion. If you are caught in the quicksand, take a few minutes to really think about the people the individuals who will be better off, healthier or happier because of what you do. Think about how you are giving of your time and talents so that others will profit in some way from your efforts.

Do you see what can happen here? When we change our focus from me to others, our work the things we do every day starts taking on a new significance.

We are now a giver. We do have gifts to give.

Our life...honestly is meaningful. We know that what we do is truly important to someone else. That ís pretty special, huh?

If you’re having to really stretch your imagination to see at least one other person benefiting from the things you do and it ís really not fitting together, you might consider looking into a different occupation or at least a different way to spend your free time.

There are a bunch of people who could really benefit from your talents. Think about what you do well what you enjoy doing that could help others have a better life. Then go do it. You’ll be out of the quicksand before you know it.

Be the Difference!

Rich

Creativity...A Critical Skill for Success

Richard Grehalva — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 12:14:48 GMT

If you are running or managing a business and want it to be around for a long time, you need to spend a good part of your time innovating. That ís because, in a fast-moving world, where people expect things to get better and better, and cheaper and cheaper, innovation is your route to getting ahead of your competition.

The American Management Association as part of the “Critical Skills Survey for the 21st Century” identified one of these skills to be “creativity”

What is creativity?...The ability to see what is NOT there and to take action.

Here are 7 ways to put new life blood into your organization through innovation.

1- Create An Innovative Climate.

Goran Ekvall of Lund University in Sweden has defined three conditions needed for a climate of innovation. They are: Trust, Dynamism, and Humour.

One of Ekvallís case studies was a Swedish newspaper where the team working on the womenís section consistently outperformed all the other teams. The reason? Quite simply, this group trusted one another, had a high level of energy and shared a common sense of humour.

Bottom Line: What is the environment you have in your business or group? What is the culture like? Ask the newest person on your team to describe it and this will give you some insight.

2- Develop Washing-Up Creativity.

According to the Roffey Park Management Institute, most flashes of inspiration come to people when they are away from work and not forcing their conscious brains to find solutions to their problems.

For some, ideas come while mowing the lawn or taking the dog for a walk or playing golf or waiting on a railway station. For Isaac Newton, it was an apple on the head while sitting in the garden. For Archimedes, it was in the bath. For others it ís while doing the dishes; that ís why Roffey Park calls these flashes of insight: washing-up creativity.

Bottom Line: I keep a pad of paper next to my chair at home. I carry a small pad of paper with me during the day. I use the voice recording app on my iPhone. What is my point? When an idea shows up...write it down or record it. At the end of the week review them all and keep the best of them and take action.

3- Make New Connections.

Making new connections between existing features of your product or service is a popular way to innovate. Akio Morita, chairman of Sony, said that he invented the Walkman because he wanted to listen to music while walking between shots on his golf course. His team simply put together two seemingly incompatible products: a tape recorder and a transistor radio.

Bottom Line: Most people and organizations focus on the answers or solutions and pay very little attention to the problem. When I asked a group what was needed they said “a new software system.” This is the answer not the solution.

4- Find Out What People Need.

Necessity is a great spur to innovation. Take, for example, writing paper. The Chinese had already made paper from rags around the year 100 BC but because there was no need for it, nothing came of it. When it did reach Europe in the Middle Ages when writing was all the rage, the supply of rags and worn-out fabric soon dried up.

That ís when a French naturalist made the discovery that wasps made their nests by chewing wood into a mash that dried in thin layers. Within 100 years, all paper was made using the idea of wood pulp.

Bottom Line: Apple did not invent the cell phone, digital camera, video...they created an experience with the iPhone. Then they opened it up to apps to help us with our everyday needs.

5- Test, Test, Test.

Product testing is the way most inventors and organizations go about innovation. It may not be the quickest route to success, but it is often the surest.

Jonas Salk, for example, discovered the polio vaccine by spending most of his time testing and testing and continually finding out what didn’t work.

Thomas Edison, the inventor of the filament light bulb, recorded 1300 experiments that were complete failures. But he was able to keep going because, as he said, he knew 1300 ways that it wasn’t going to work.

Bottom Line: Be prepared for set backs...it is part of the process.

6- Adopt and Adapt.

One relatively easy approach to innovation is to notice how others deal with problems and then adapt their solutions to your own. It ís known as adapt and adopt.

It ís what watchmakers Swatch did when they realized that the more reliable their watches became, the less people needed to replace them.

Their solution? Borrow an idea from the world of fashion and collections by turning their watches into desirable fashion accessories. Now people buy Swatch watches not just to tell the time but because it ís cool to do so.

Bottom Line: Observe, observe, observe. What are people doing at Starbucks? What ideas could you come up with? What are the trends? Where can you combine two ideas or processes into one.

7- Take Lessons From Nature.

If you really want to be inventive, you can’t beat nature. The world of nature gives us an endless supply of prototypes to use in our own world.

Take Velcro, for example. Velcro was patented by Georges de Mestral in 1950 after he returned from a hunting trip covered in tiny burrs that had attached themselves to his clothing by tiny overlapping hooks.

De Mestral quickly realized that here was an ideal technique to fasten material together. A whole new way of doing things was suddenly invented.

Bottom Line: Think Differently

The history of the world is the history of innovation. Thomas Kuhn called each acceptance of a new innovation a paradigm shift.

Once a new innovation becomes accepted, the world has changed for ever and can never go back to the way it was.

Be the Difference!

Rich

Clean Out Your Closet and Enjoy Your Life

Richard Grehalva — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 12:00:00 GMT

After leading a personal transformation retreat. I was contacted by a group to lead them on something like a vision quest. When I talked to them. I decided what they really needed was to clean out their closet.

With the hustle and bustle of our everyday lives, we can often find ourselves yearning for a quieter, simpler way of living. If your life has come to resemble an endless race to the finish line, take a look at the suggestions below to bring a greater sense of calm and simplicity back into your life.

Here are three steps I took them through.

1 - Less is more.

It ís amazing how much stuff we can accumulate in our homes because we think they will contribute to our lives. It ís true that we gain enjoyment from material possessions, but the more we accumulate the more burdened we often feel. Eventually we find ourselves living under a constant cloud of confusion, scattered thoughts and stress.

So, what did I do with the group to get them to clean out their closet?

I asked them to go to their closet and pick the piece of clothing that they had been hanging there for years. I asked them to pick the one that was hidden way in the back that held some kind of memory. The shirt that was way to small or whatever it was.

When they met with me they recalled the memories that each piece of clothing held for them. As they told me what it was I asked “are ready to let that part of you go?” Some were and some were not.

Some of them wanted to hang on to a memory. They wanted to go back to it but knew that was not going to happen. Some of them knew that the time of their life was gone and now it was time for the next stage.Some were just not ready to let go.

What is it for you?

Begin immediately to clear out the material possessions you no longer need or want, and donate them to a local charitable organization. This will accomplish two things: first, you will feel lighter and less cramped in your home; and you will also feel good about giving these items to people who can actually use them.

2 - Next is to clean out some of your activities.

An active life is good for you, but not if it leaves you feeling stressed and fatigued! Most of us take on much more than necessary as far as obligations and even recreational activities are concerned.

Take a few minutes to think about the things you do on a daily, weekly and monthly basis. Do you really need to do all of them? Have you taken on responsibilities that really aren’t yours? Are you spending time on activities you no longer enjoy? Make a list of at least a few activities or obligations that you can eliminate, and then go ahead and do so even if you have to do this gradually.

3 - Spend time with yourself in silence.

One of the men I was working with had so many voices in his head...he could not listen to his voice of inner wisdom. We went outside and I had him sit on the ground next to a tree...to get grounded. I read that on average we spend less than 15 minutes a day with ourselves. It is no wonder this man could not hear his voice...he did not know how.

Sitting in silence for just a few minutes can drastically reduce your stress levels and leave you feeling calm, centered and happy.

If you live near a park or natural setting, you can even boost the effectiveness of this activity by spending time in nature. While not completely silent, natural settings have soothing sounds like running water, singing birds and wind coming through the trees which automatically trigger feelings of peace and well-being.

When it comes right down to it, cleaning out your closet is about learning how to slow down and connect more deeply with your inner self. Whether you do that by simplifying your surroundings, calming your schedule or enjoying a quiet respite each day, the result is a happier and more peaceful you!

Be the Difference!

Rich

The Power of the East

Richard Grehalva — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 12:00:00 GMT

I have a friend out in San Diego that has a home in the mountains...his placed is called “Sunrise Ranch.” As you would think there is a reason this awesome place has this name. Every time I have been there I grab a cup of coffee early in the morning and sit outside facing “east” waiting for the sun to rise over the mountains. In this moment of silence...I think of the possibilities.

From a Native American perspective the “east” represents “new beginnings” the past is gone...tomorrow is not here but this moment brings..whatever I decide to do with it.

What are your thoughts for the new day? Do you tend to let your outer circumstances set the tone for each day? Do you allow other people and events to trigger feelings of anger, frustration, impatience and more?

When you do this, you are not using the power you have available to you! By using the power of the “east”, you can turn every day into a great day. One way to do that is by using intentions and visualization to create your day.

When you first wake up in the morning, spend 10 minutes or so thinking about the types of things you would like to experience that day.

How would you like your workday to go?

What kind of people would you like to meet?
Would you like to receive some great opportunities to advance your career or financial situation?
How would you like to feel for the majority of your day?

Grab a blank journal or notebook and jot these details down! Once you have gotten all the details written down, spend a few minutes vividly imagining each scenario in your mind, exactly as you would like it to happen. Pretend you are watching a movie in your mind, play it in color, make it big, seeing it all play out exactly as you would like it to.

Most importantly, allow yourself to feel as if they were actually happening now. Immerse yourself in feelings of excitement, joy, happiness and gratitude as you enjoy one great experience after another. Use this same process for every experience you would like to have that day.

By the time you have finished you should be feeling fantastic; buzzing with good spirits and high expectations!

Then continue with your normal routine, taking special care not to be attached to any specific events or experiences, just simply staying open to whatever comes. Keep affirming that great things are going to happen to you that day, and you feel great about all of the blessings and abundance in your life.

At the same time, avoid getting entangled in feelings of worry, anxiety, frustration, and anger as much as possible throughout the day because those feelings will interfere with the positive energy you have already put out.

As often as you can remember, call to mind images of the things you visualized earlier and allow good feelings to flow over you again. Affirm and know that wonderful things are happening, even if you don not see them quite yet.

By using this process on a daily basis, you will eventually start to notice that good things are starting to happen. You will find yourself being in the right place at the right time and generally enjoying greater opportunities and abundance.

Each evening sit with the sunset and this is looking to the “west” where it is time for introspection of your day. If it did not turn out the way you wanted...replay the way you would have wanted. Do this and your life will never be the same.

Be the Difference!

Rich

Speaking at World Sales Forum

Richard Grehalva — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 13:40:28 GMT

Hey Everyone,

Just wanted to drop you a note that I will be speaking at the World Sales Forum in Bogota, Colombia March 9, 2012. I'm excited to be speaking on "how to create and apply a consultative mindset."

I will be adding to my blog more about this topic in the coming months. If you happen to be one of my subscribers in Latin America I hope to see you there.

Here is the link to the press release

http://www.prlog.org/11794263-richard-grehalvarecognized-consultative-sales-expert-to-present-at-world-sales-forum.html

Cheers,

Rich

Are You Committed or Compliant?

Richard Grehalva — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 12:42:00 GMT

Dr. Peter Senge author of “The Fifth Discipline” describes the difference between “commitment” and “compliance.” To illustrate his point he uses the late President John Kennedy’s quote that the United States should set as a goal "landing a man on the moon and returning him safely to the earth" by the end of the decade.

We during that time as a nation, as businesses, as people were committed to meeting this goal. I still remember watching “live” on TV, the first time we landed on the moon and retuning them safely to the earth.

Often when I work with organizations they falsely believe that their employees are committed to the company’s goals but in reality..they are just “compliant” but not “committed.” This is the same for individuals.

We set our own goals but...are we “committed?”...or...are we “compliant?”

Have you ever set a goal and not achieved it? Most people have. In fact, itís quite common for people to get stuck in an endless cycle of setting goals and then quitting them shortly afterwards and accomplishing nothing at all.

Why do people do this?

One of the biggest reasons is a lack of commitment to their goal. Without commitment a goal will gradually shrink in importance, and the temptation to quit will seem much more attractive, especially when obstacles cause setbacks and delays.

On the other hand, if you make a serious commitment and then continually remind yourself of it, you will be much more likely to persevere and achieve the goal.

Here ís how to commit to your goals:

1- First and foremost, you have to make sure that every goal you set is of VITAL importance to you.

This can be tricky because we so often fool ourselves into thinking we want one thing when we want something entirely different. Take some time with this part of the process, and be sure that you get to the heart of what you really want.

Why do you want it?
What will it do for you?
What positive things will it bring to your life?
How will it help you?
How will it make you feel when itís accomplished?

Write all of this down and keep it handy so you can refer to it as often as necessary if you feel your commitment beginning to slip.

Also ask yourself if your goal is worth the effort and sacrifice that will be needed to achieve it. If you can honestly answer yes, you are on the way! If not and go back and make adjustments and then ask yourself again.

2- Think about what will happen if you do not follow through.

Would nothing much happen if you do not achieve your goal? If not, then you need to raise the stakes! You have to make your goal the most important thing in the world, and if you do not do it, you will deal with negative consequences. Even if you have to indulge in a bit of make believe...my mentor would tell me “fake it till you make it.”

3- Then, each and every day, renew your commitment.

It ís easy to be committed if your goal is new and your motivation is high, but you need to be able to STAY committed ñ no matter what! Each day when you awaken, read through the goal you wrote down on the first day, and stress again how vitally important it is to you. Promise yourself that you are going to do as much as you can to work on your goal that day, and every day until you achieve it.

When it comes right down to it, no one can achieve your goals for you.

If you want to achieve them, you will have to find the determination necessary to keep going. Inactivity and procrastination are usually nothing more than bad habits. Turning those habits into something more positive and productive is as simple as taking it a day at a time and working your hardest to change your life. The more committed and determined you are to making your goal happen, the more likely you will do just that.

Bottom Line: Remember the Nike commercial a few years ago...”Just Do It!”

Be the Difference!

Rich

How to Get Unstuck in Decision Making

Richard Grehalva — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 13:00:00 GMT

One of my mentors and teachers was Dr.Ron Hering. As I was going through his program, to become a certified trainer in Accelerated Behavior Change...we would discuss the process of making decisions or not making decisions.

Have you ever felt nervous about making a decision that could affect the rest of your life? Who hasn't !

It's fairly common for people to vacillate back and forth between several choices, whether they are related to career, money, business, opportunities, or even relationships.

The good news is that making wise decisions is a matter of weighing the potential pros and cons of every available outcome. Below you'll find a simple 3-step process to help you make wise decisions no matter what part of your life they may affect.

1- What Do You Stand to Gain?

When you've got more than one option to choose from, a great first question to ask of each one is, "What do I stand to gain from choosing this option?" If the rewards are big, you might be willing to withstand a bit of risk in order to benefit from the opportunity. Conversely, if the payoff would be small, you might not feel so confident about taking a chance right now.

2- What Do You Stand to Lose?

The next question to ask is, "What do I stand to lose if this option doesn't work out?" No one likes to think of the negatives in a potential opportunity, but you could save yourself a lot of heartache with a bit of foresight! If your losses could be huge with a particular option, you might decide to hold off for awhile to see if the odds improve over time.

3- What's the Worst Thing that Could Happen?

Finally, take it one step further and ask, "What is the worst thing that could happen if I choose this option, and would I be willing to accept those consequences?" It may seem like a very pessimistic question, but it's extremely effective at clarifying the situation! If you couldn't handle the consequences of making such a choice, then you know immediately that it's not the right choice for you at this time. If, on the other hand, the consequences wouldnít be so bad, you know itís a viable option for you.

What do you do if all of your options hold the same potential rewards and consequences? Go with your gut! Take a few minutes to think carefully about each possibility, and then choose the one you feel strongest about. When it comes right down to it, there are no guarantees in decision-making.

Bottom Line: You simply weigh the pros and cons, listen to your intuition, and do the best you can.

In the end, there really isnít any such thing as a "bad" decision, because you do learn something from each one you make. If you keep that in mind you should grow more confident with each choice you make, which will help you make even better decisions in the future.

Be the Difference!

Rich

Find your Spark and Accelerate your Success

Richard Grehalva — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 11:46:02 GMT

My hobby is racing and I’m an amateur race car driver. One day I was sitting in my race car ready to go out on the track before a race. As I was sitting there going through my mental check list was the car ready?, was I ready?...it came to me. I realized something.

The most important thing that had to happen was the internal spark.

The spark creates an explosion in the chamber that moves the piston and eventually the drive train that moves the wheels forward. This was my "AH HA" moment. We all need to have an internal spark to create our explosion to move us towards our goals. This became the foundation of “The MOTOvation System” that I will be releasing in the next few months.

Here is what happens when we lose our spark. If you have ever been stuck in a rut of inertia before, you probably know the sense of helpless futility that takes over your life. You want your life to change, but you feel powerless to do anything about it yourself. You may find yourself constantly making plans to improve your life, but never quite getting around to taking action because it seems so intimidating.

Though taking action finding your spark sometimes can intimidate and frighten you, it can also empower you!

If you learn to use it effectively, it can provide the fuel to keep you moving forward toward more fulfilling life circumstances. When you do this, you realize that there was never anything to fear in the first place, and you will never get stuck again! Because, you now have the information to know how to get past a limiting belief.

Below are three simple steps that show you how to get started:

1- First, be sure you understand that your life is the way it is right now because of your hesitation in taking action!

This is important, because you will understand the importance of moving forward no matter how anxious it makes you feel at first.

Then, decide on one action to take to get the ball rolling. Think about your life right now, and ask yourself which situations you want to change first. You might choose your career, relationships, health, financial situation, or anything else that makes you feel powerless and stuck. Then think about one simple action you can take to inspire some positive change. It does not have to be a huge action, just SOMETHING to start building momentum.

2- Once you have decided on your action step, youíll have to push yourself to take it no matter what!

This may seem incredibly difficult or even scary, but remember that most often the things you fear are not going to happen. In fact, you may not even have a clear reason for feeling scared ñ you are just afraid of the unknown. Give yourself a pep talk or push yourself in any way you have to in order to move forward at least a little bit. After you take that first step, be sure to let go of any expectations of the things that will happen because of it, and allow yourself to feel great simply because you did something about it!

3- Repeat the same steps. Once you have taken one step forward, you will need to keep pushing yourself to take others.

Consider this: Even if you take a hundred small steps in a month, you will be putting forth positive effort to make changes in your life, which cannot help but bring about better circumstances!

The good news is that taking action quickly begins to build momentum. Just as chronic non-action can create a cycle of negativity and stagnation over time, being proactive can create a positive cycle that continues to grow! It gets easier the more you do it, which eventually makes it seem almost effortless ñ and you continue to empower and strengthen yourself with every step you take.

Find your spark!

Be the Difference!

Rich

Make New Mistakes...Not the Same Ones

Richard Grehalva — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 12:11:00 GMT

A friend of mine said to me the other day. “I wish we would make new mistakes...instead of making the same mistakes.” I started to think about what he said and realized the lesson we could all learn from this statement.

Have you ever held back on doing something because you were afraid of failure? Most people have! Lets face it; no one likes to fail. None of us likes to feel like were ineffective, weak or lacking in any way, and that ís exactly how failure makes us feel.

However, you may be surprised to know that failure doesn't exist until YOU say it does. In the dictionary, failure has several definitions:

Failing to do or perform
A state of inability to perform a normal function adequately
Giving way under stress
A lack of success.

Look carefully at those definitions and you'll probably realize they have one thing in common when it comes to goal achievement: failure is a PERCEPTION.

Think about this... we were not born with this perception. If we were...all of us would still be crawling because learning to walk means failing before we succeed.

The moment you decide to give up or stop working toward your goals, failure is born.

But what if you never do that? What if you continue working toward your goals, one step at a time for as long as it takes? There ís no failure then, is there?

This insight should be very encouraging if you’ve been working toward goals and not yet seeing positive results. Simply keep going and you cannot fail!

Here are three tips to help you stay strong and focused on your goals:

1- Never give yourself an out.

Most people do this without even realizing it. They are willing to work hard on achieving their goals, until the going gets too rough or their motivation dwindles. Don’t do that! Commit to making your goals happen, no matter what! Never quit, never contemplate admitting failure, and never lose your inner determination.

2- Don’t get hooked on a specific timeframe for completion.

It ís okay to set a general timeline, but be aware that some circumstances will be beyond your control, so you can’t say for sure when your goal will be achieved. If you do that, you are just setting yourself up for failure! Instead, get a general idea of when you would like your goal to be completed, but then take it a day at a time and focus on making progress, not reaching the finish line in as little time as possible.

3- Finally, be sure that you don’t view obstacles and setbacks as failures.

The two are completely different. An obstacle, setback or delay means only one thing: it ís not time for your goal to be completed yet. That ís it! It doesn’t mean you failed; it doesn’t mean you are weak; it does not mean you will never achieve your goals. It simply means you are not done yet. You have got to keep moving forward and find a way around or through the obstacle.

Failing happens when we fall into this trap:

If you believe you have failed...then you have.
If you believe you do not have the ability to succeed...then you don’t.
If you believe you cant handle the pressure of achieving your goals...you cant.
If you believe you are not successful... you are not.

Failure only exists in your own mind!

“Do and Do Not”...”Can and Cannot” are choices...which one will you choose?

Be the Difference!

Rich

Accept Who You Are and Change Your Life!

Richard Grehalva — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 13:35:00 GMT

Growing up I was told by many people why I would not succeed...but I decided to take charge of my life. How about you? Are you ready to take charge of your life? To help you on the path I have a few questions for you.

Do you have the ability to accept the things you can change and the things you cannot change?

Do you have the ability to accept that other people are opt to change them, rather than you changing them?

Do you accept that you are...who you are, regardless of what others think?

Can you accept the many changes that take place in your life?

If you answered yes to one or all of these questions then you are off to the start of improving your personal life.

If you are willing to accept, you have the ability to laugh, even when something is not funny. For instance, if someone pushed you, you could stand back and laugh. The push is only a threat to your emotion, which you will see, accept and find a way to gain control of the situation.

When you can accept things in life, including you and others you find a way to take control. When you are in control, it helps you to see how you can improve your personal life.

When you learn to accept you will learn to discover you.

We have emotions, thoughts, behaviors, actions, and have been plagued by a world of influences both good and bad. Each day we will feel something new, which causes our personality to reflect on these changes. Therefore, when you see someone laughing one minute and crying the next, you are seeing a shift in emotions, which is a normal pattern of identity for this person. Unless the persons eyes change, behaviors change dramatically, friends change regularly, etc, and you are seeing common behaviors.

We live in a world that desensitizes us. We are surrounding by billions of influences on television, in the media, on radio, in house-holds, government, schools and so forth.

Each to their own, but everyone is judging someone at some time, which is something we have to accept.

You can stop looking at the news and wasting your time by taking in these negative messages over and over. Read a book, talk to your family, go for a walk and do something positive for yourself.

We cannot change these peoples behaviors and way of thinking, but we can change ours. This is a part of learning and accepting.

The best way around the world is become your own influence and allow other influences to make someone else’s life miserable. Only rely on sources that prove truthful with their actions, behaviors and words. Positive reflections are the key to living happier.

Once you learn to accept you will be eager to laugh. For instance, if someone makes you mad you will see the humor in his or her actions. You may see the humor in your actions if you make a mistake and feed into their stupidity.

Once you start to see the humor in life, you will feel better inside. We are involved in a unruly world filled with greedy people, envious souls, lusty tigers, and so on. We have to learn how to work around these people, accept us and move on. Once you learn to change to better you, other people may follow. Good conduct has proven far more effective than words to encourage others to change.

As you grow you will feel a new hunger, and that hunger will guide you to discover new ways to better you. In time as you start to feel better, you will see a need to exercise, eat right, and hang out with positive influences and so on.

Once you feel this hunger, you will feel inspired to labor to achieve your goals.

Be The Difference!

Rich

Want to Reduce Stress...Set Goals

Richard Grehalva — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 12:13:34 GMT

When you are feeling under the whether all the time perhaps it is because you are stressed. Stress alone can cause major psychological and mental problems. In fact, stress can cause self-induced exaggerated problems. Stress causes confusion, since it targets your physical, emotional responses, and psychological aspects while causing you pain. Stress is the leading problem that everyone in the world faces at one time or another.

What causes stress:

Bills cause stress, especially if you do not have cash flow to pay the bills. Jobs will cause stress, since you battle to make sure your duties are correctly handled. Children cause stress. Especially nowadays, since the media, television, etc has polluted and corrupted the minds of our children by offering them nudity, violence, and other harmful actions on air. A bad relationship can cause stress. If you are in a bad relationship, it only affects your mind and physical well-being, causing you stress. There are many reasons a person can feel stressed. The upside is, you have the choice to make stress your best friend or worst enemy.

What are the different kinds of stress?

There are many kinds of stress that can cause you problems like the acute stress this is a short term stress problem normally, which may last shortly or could carry forward. You want to avoid overstressing self. One of the common reasons someone develops acute stress is because they are thinking of how to change things they cannot change. Only change the things you can change and learn to accept. We all deal with everyday challenges. Take each challenge as a learning experience. We all have to pay bills, work, and so on. It's a part of life. We all have to face it. Sometimes we do not have the money to pay bills. Learn to set a budget that relieves you of stress. You may loose your job. Instead of sweating the problem, do something about it.

Children these days are increasing stress for parents. Many teenagers these days are difficult to manage. Today our children are plagued with mental illnesses, far more so than at one time in history. When you feel chronic stress, burned out and do not see hope, it is time to seek help. Your doctor or mental health expert can help you manage stress emerging from difficulty teenagers.

How to reduce stress:

You can reduce stress by managing, planning and setting goals.

When you have something to look forward to, it improves your personal life. The first thing you want to consider while planning and setting goals is truth. The truth is what sets you free. Everything you do in life should uphold the truth. If you are not sure, research to learn the truth. You can take many steps to reduce stress.

To improve your life and reduce stress you may want to consider education. If you lack skills, experience or education you will benefit from returning to school.

You want to avoid setting traps for your memory and intelligence, since the emotions play unhealthy games if you allow it. What I mean is you want to avoid telling yourself I cannot do it. Life is too hard. Life is easier if you learn to think positive.

How you can improve, your personal life is up to you. You will need to consult with your inner counselor to learn what you need, what you are lacking and the steps you can take to improve your personal life. If you are unsure, seek feedback. Feedback is the key that leads you to success.

Be the Difference!

Rich

Facing the Moment of Truth...What WIll You Do?

Richard Grehalva — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 13:30:00 GMT

When the tragedy of the Costa Concordia started to unfold. It was very real to me. My wife and I had in September taken a cruise on the Costa Cruise line. We were on a cruise to visit the Fjords in Norway.

As I watched I noticed the side of the ship that was in the ocean was the side our stateroom was on. All I could do is imagine what if we had been on this ship? How would I have acted when faced with my “Moment of Truth?”

I watched in horror not just the fact of the people who were missing and scared but the unbelievable action taken by the captain.

Here is just part of the transcript between the Coast Guard Commander De Faco and Captain Schettino of the Costa Concordia.

De Falco: "You go aboard. It is an order. Don't make any more excuses. You have declared 'abandon ship.' Now I am in charge. You go on board! Is that clear? Do you hear me? Go, and call me when you are aboard. My air rescue crew is there."

Schettino: "Where are your rescuers?"

De Falco: "My air rescue is on the prow. Go. There are already bodies, Schettino."

Schettino: "How many bodies are there?"

De Falco: "I don't know. I have heard of one. You are the one who has to tell me how many there are. Christ."

Schettino: "But do you realize it is dark and here we can't see anything..."

De Falco: "And so what? You want to go home, Schettino? It is dark and you want to go home? Get on that prow of the boat using the pilot ladder and tell me what can be done, how many people there are and what their needs are. Now!"

As we all know he never went back to his boat. When he faced his “Moment of Truth” he acted but in a way that I’m guessing will haunt him for the rest of his life.

And this is the topic of my post:

How have you acted in your “Moment of Truth?”

Your moment may not have been as dramatic but consider:

I know a very successful sales professional who for 5 years never gave up on a contract with a client.

Even when they selected a competitor product he faced his “Moment of Truth” to give up and work the next deal.

He told them why they were would be back and stayed in contact and it happened. The product they selected did not meet their needs and he got the deal.

Would you have given up?

Walt Disney in 1938 made the first full length color film “Snow White and the 7 dwarfs.” Both his brother and wife asked him not to do it. It was too risky no body will come.

It was his “Moment of Truth”

As we know he created the family classic and his film was the highest grossing film that year.

Would you have given up?

We all face our “Moment of Truth”...What will you do?

I’m waiting to hear and read the stories from this tragedy. I know there were ordinary people when faced with their “Moment of Truth” did not leave. They stayed and helped those that needed it.

Be the Difference,

Rich

Change your Point of VIew and Enjoy your Life

Richard Grehalva — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 13:30:00 GMT

"If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought” Peace Pilgrim

In life, you are always filled with choices. You may opt to have a pessimist’s view and live a self-defeated life or you may decide to take the optimist’s route and take a challenging and fulfilling life.

So why nurture an optimist’s point of view? And why now?

Well, optimism has been linked to having a positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from trauma.

On the other hand, the rates of depression and pessimism have never been higher. It affects middle-aged adults the same way it hits younger people. The mean age of onset has gone from 30 to 15. It is no longer a middle-aged housewife’s disorder but also a teen-ager’s disorder’ as well.

Here’s how optimists are in action and researches that back up why it really pays to be an optimist:

Optimists expect the best

The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad events, which will last a long time and undermine everything they do, are their own fault.

The truth is optimists are confronted with the same hard knocks of this world. What differs is the way they explain their misfortune---it’s the opposite way. They tend to believe defeat is just a temporary setback, that its causes are confined to this one case.

Optimists tend to focus on and plan for the 'problem' at hand. They use 'positive reinterpretation.' In other words, they most likely reinterpret a negative experience in a way that helps them learn and grow. Such people are unfazed by bad situation, they perceive it is a challenge and try harder.

They won’t say “things will never get better,” “If I failed once, it will happen again” and “If I experience misfortune in one part of my life, then it will happen in my whole life.”

Positive expectancies of optimists also predict better reactions during transitions to new environments, sudden tragedies and unlikely turn of events. If they fall, they will stand up. They see opportunities instead of obstacles.

People respond positively to optimists

Optimists are proactive and less dependent on others for their happiness. They find no need to control or manipulate people. They usually draw people towards them. Their optimistic view of the world can be contagious and influence those they are with.

Optimism seems a socially desirable trait in all communities. Those who share optimism are generally accepted while those who spread gloom, panic and hysteria are treated unfavorably.

In life, these people often win elections; get voted most congenial and sought for advice.

When the going gets tough, optimists get tougher

Optimists typically maintain higher levels of subjective well-being during times of stress than do people who are less optimistic. In contrast, pessimists are likely to react to stressful events by denying that they exist or by avoiding dealing with problems. Pessimists are more likely to quit trying when difficulties arise.

They persevere. They just don’t give up easily, they are also known for their patience. Inching their way a step closer to that goal or elusive dream.

Optimists are healthier and live longer

Medical research has justified that simple pleasures and a positive outlook can cause a measurable increase in the body's ability to fight disease.

Optimists’ health is unusually good. They age well, much freer than most people from the usual physical ills of middle age. And they get to outlive those prone to negative thoughts.

So why not be an optimist today? And think positively towards a more fulfilled life.

Why not look forward to success in all your endeavors? Why not be resilient? Like everybody else you are bound to hit lows sometimes but don’t just stay there.

Be the Difference,

Rich

Stop Denying It...You Are A Salesperson

Richard Grehalva — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 13:00:00 GMT

Strange as it may seem, our life is made up of a series of “sales presentations”. Sales may not be your gig, but if you’re the boss you’re making presentations everyday. Be it a pitch to your Board, announcing a policy change to employees, selling an idea to your spouse, or just trying to win others over to your point of view – you need to punch up your people skills for winning pitches.

Human nature is such that people support solutions that they help create, so involve them by allowing your audience to participate with questions or ideas. It goes without saying that to not involve key people is risky, because messages can be misunderstood. Your plans may be derailed before they begin if sufficient “buy-in” is lacking. Use lots of open-ended questions in your presentation to draw out the silent type.

Preparation is a key to success. Prepare your listeners to what’s coming during or before your presentation. Try these pre-meeting tactics:

Assign task-related pre-work. This could be pre-reading or study of a problem, and the preparations of possible solutions. An example could be, “go and visit three kinds of accounts before the meeting.”
Make pre-meeting contacts with those invited by email, phone, or in person. You might want to try an informal survey to get people’s position on the issues at hand.

Remember support on key or controversial matters can be established ahead of time by lobbying, if you know where to lobby.

Do your research! People who make it look easy and are effective presenters have a hidden arsenal. This is an arsenal of up-to-date, organized material that can be accessed quickly in ready-to-use form when needed. They have the stats to back up their ideas, and they have a mental arsenal of stories, examples, jokes, and ice-breakers to use when needed.

Your physical presentation could include tangible items relating to the issue such as recent articles clipped from newspapers or magazines, photographs, reports, and demonstration property. To become masterful in this art learn to maintain resources you can access for just the right thing at the right time.

The next thing you must do is to explain “why?” The single most powerful thing you can do to convince your audience of something is to provide a convincing reason why they should do what you suggest or believe what you say. People want and need a clear “WIIFM” – “what’s in it for me?” – to be able to react positively to what you want them to do. It’s extremely important that you deliver a vision of benefits. Hearing the “why” won’t automatically generate a “yes” to your proposition, but it’ll open the door for receptivity to your idea.

Knowing and accepting the “why” satisfies a basic need that we all have – to understand the purpose of our actions. Use the words “because” or “so that” in your presentation and then finish the phrase. When your subject matter is controversial or likely to generate emotions, it is essential that your “why’s” be tested in advance. Ask some people you trust or that are on your “team” to play devil’s advocate to help you with your logic and arguments.

For now, let me leave you with this thought.

Life is a sales job from beginning to end. From the moment that we discern how to get approval as children, winning friends at school, getting our first (and subsequent) job, getting engaged and married, achieving our goals, and anything else you can think of in between – we’re selling ourselves or our ideas all along the way.

Who said you weren’t a salesperson?

Be the Difference!

Rich

Guru Success Tips

Richard Grehalva — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 13:30:00 GMT

Author Michael Jeffreys personally interviewed 15 top motivational gurus in 1997 for his then upcoming book. After talking to gurus from Brian Tracy to Dr. Wayne Dyer, he distilled 8 Secrets to Success they all agreed upon. These secrets are still good today and are as follows:

Take 100% Responsibility for Your Life – In a society where people blame everything from their parents to the government for failure, those who don’t buy into this mentality or succumb to the “victim” thinking succeed. To blame something or somebody outside yourself is saying they have control of your life and not you. Someone else’s opinion of you doesn’t have to become your reality.

Live Your Life On Purpose - What separates motivational thinkers from the unsuccessful is that they believe they’re doing what they were put her to do. The difference between this and just living, is that the latter is just getting through the week with the least problems. But when you live your life on purpose, your main concern is doing the job right. For the entrepreneur this means finding a cause you believe in and building your business around it.

Be Willing to Pay the Price - Be willing to pay the price for your dreams. Wanting a big house, a luxury car, and a million dollars in the bank is all very nice, and everyone wants these things – but are you willing to pay the price to get them? This is one of the major differences between the successful and unsuccessful.

Stay Focused – Every day we’re bombarded with hundreds of tasks, phone calls, messages, and everyone competing for our time. Focusing requires giving up something in the present because you are investing your time in something that will pay off big-time down the road. Jack Canfield and Mark Hanson were turned by 30 publishers when they submitted the first “Chicken Soup for the Soul” book. Instead of giving up, they stayed focused on their goal and did four or five interviews per day for radio, TV, and newspapers, for five days a week for a whole year. Eventually, a small publisher decided to take a chance, and of course now it’s a best-seller that spawned an entire series that have sold more than 10 million copies.

Become An Expert in Your Field One striking factor all successful people have in common is how seriously they take their profession. They strive to be the best at what they do, and do almost anything to improve. If someone followed you around all day with a video camera at your business, would it be a tape you’d be proud of or embarrassed about? Make the decision today to work at being the best in your field. How? By finding out what the “best” in your field are doing, and do what they do.

Write Out a Plan for Achieving Your Goals - Write out an action plan/map for how you’re going to achieve your goals. Trying to reach your goals without a plan is like trying to drive from Los Angeles to Chicago without a map. A goal that isn’t written down is merely a wish or fantasy.

Never Give Up - Never, never, never give up. When you’re fully committed to achieving your goal, giving up is not an option. You must be willing do whatever it takes to make it happen. The power of perseverance is an awesome force. As someone once said, “inch by inch it’s a cinch”. Think of the lowly inchworm – if it pondered the length of the trip from start to finish before it started, it probably would never move. To a worm’s point-of-view, the garden path must look like a trip to Mars. Never give up! Keep on going like the Eveready battery bunny, and pretty soon you’re there.

Don’t Delay - Nobody knows how much time they have left to accomplish their dreams, and we must remember that we don’t have forever. The clock is ticking, and sooner or later your number comes up and you’re gone. Successful achievers know this too, but they don’t view it as a “negative”. Achievers use it to “spur them on”. They go after what they want as energetically and as passionately as possible, for as long as they have.

I had a friend who used to say, “Today is a check – cash it! Yesterday is an I.O.U. – forget it! Tomorrow is a promissory note, don’t bank on it!” I think that’s a pretty good summation of life, so go out there and cash in on that “today” check.

Be the Difference!

Rich